Comments on: Breastfeeding was crazy hard, but weaning is sad too http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too We will not be pacified Fri, 10 Sep 2010 12:05:45 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Mukel http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-2#comment-5236 Mukel Thu, 01 Apr 2010 10:12:47 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-5236 Oh, the things they DON'T tell you about breastfeeding. I spent the first 6 weeks freaking out thinking that I didn't have enough milk, even though my son was gaining weight well. He had a frenulectomy that may or may not have been necessary--we'll never know now, but he cried a lot during the procedure and I felt terrible about it. When he was sleepy, I worried that it was because he wasn't getting enough calories. When he was wakeful, I worried that it was because he wasn't satisfied. The problem was me all along--brought on by sleep deprivation, I think. One day my mother watched me feed him and said "Well, he SEEMS satisfied." And just like that, I was back in touch with reality. I thought our problems were over, but then at 3 months he became DISTRACTIBLE. As in, almost impossible to nurse while awake. This continued for 2 months while I was sure he was going to starve himself. Then, magically, he could nurse while awake. He is 8 months now and still can't nurse in public or in a brightly lit room, or if anyone else is in the room! So much for breastfeeding being portable. THEN. At 6 months, I started getting regular plugged ducts. Painful! Scary! (Because you think the MASTITIS monster is coming. I have gotten better at treating them. I thought, at least we can start solids now and that will take the pressure off a bit. NO, he was not a fan of solids at first. He still MAYBE eats two little solid meals a day and nurses the rest of the time. The latest: BITING! We're still learning how to deal with this one. What is the moral of this story? That sometimes breastfeeding CONTINUES to present new challenges... even many months later. And that you (and everybody else) should be okay with any choice that you make about it--to do it, to not do it, to do it some of the time. I myself really hope we make it to a year, but I always feel like I never know what the future holds! I wish I could take it all a little less seriously. Oh, the things they DON'T tell you about breastfeeding. I spent the first 6 weeks freaking out thinking that I didn't have enough milk, even though my son was gaining weight well. He had a frenulectomy that may or may not have been necessary–we'll never know now, but he cried a lot during the procedure and I felt terrible about it. When he was sleepy, I worried that it was because he wasn't getting enough calories. When he was wakeful, I worried that it was because he wasn't satisfied. The problem was me all along–brought on by sleep deprivation, I think. One day my mother watched me feed him and said "Well, he SEEMS satisfied." And just like that, I was back in touch with reality.

I thought our problems were over, but then at 3 months he became DISTRACTIBLE. As in, almost impossible to nurse while awake. This continued for 2 months while I was sure he was going to starve himself. Then, magically, he could nurse while awake. He is 8 months now and still can't nurse in public or in a brightly lit room, or if anyone else is in the room! So much for breastfeeding being portable.

THEN. At 6 months, I started getting regular plugged ducts. Painful! Scary! (Because you think the MASTITIS monster is coming. I have gotten better at treating them. I thought, at least we can start solids now and that will take the pressure off a bit. NO, he was not a fan of solids at first. He still MAYBE eats two little solid meals a day and nurses the rest of the time.

The latest: BITING! We're still learning how to deal with this one.

What is the moral of this story? That sometimes breastfeeding CONTINUES to present new challenges… even many months later. And that you (and everybody else) should be okay with any choice that you make about it–to do it, to not do it, to do it some of the time. I myself really hope we make it to a year, but I always feel like I never know what the future holds! I wish I could take it all a little less seriously.

]]> By: Maren http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-2#comment-3597 Maren Wed, 24 Feb 2010 19:11:15 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3597 I just have to chime in with a "me too!" I haven't really had pain besides some tenderness for the first week, but still breastfeeding has been rough for us. My little guy would nurse CONSTANTLY, and I mean that literally, during the first month, and yet he was losing weight instead of gaining. Had to supplement with formula and used the SNS and paced bottle feeding, but nursing just doesn't always do it for him now. We're still trying though at 7 weeks and I hope that we'll be able to wean from the formula and go back to all breast feeding. It's nice to feel less alone on this. I don't know how many times I've cried and felt angry that I didn't have the wonderful breastfeeding relationship they always tell you you'll have if you just "hold on for these few weeks" I just have to chime in with a "me too!" I haven't really had pain besides some tenderness for the first week, but still breastfeeding has been rough for us. My little guy would nurse CONSTANTLY, and I mean that literally, during the first month, and yet he was losing weight instead of gaining. Had to supplement with formula and used the SNS and paced bottle feeding, but nursing just doesn't always do it for him now. We're still trying though at 7 weeks and I hope that we'll be able to wean from the formula and go back to all breast feeding. It's nice to feel less alone on this. I don't know how many times I've cried and felt angry that I didn't have the wonderful breastfeeding relationship they always tell you you'll have if you just "hold on for these few weeks"

]]> By: Rozi http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3208 Rozi Mon, 08 Feb 2010 16:23:13 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3208 I had the exact same problem! Natural my buttocks. For weeks my nipples felt like I could light the gas hob with them. But then they stopped hurting, although the milk flow still made them really sore. I stopped breast feeding at six months and I think the whole thing was so worth it. It's a different experience for different women, but ultimately, you have to do what's right for you and the bubbah! I had the exact same problem! Natural my buttocks. For weeks my nipples felt like I could light the gas hob with them.
But then they stopped hurting, although the milk flow still made them really sore. I stopped breast feeding at six months and I think the whole thing was so worth it. It's a different experience for different women, but ultimately, you have to do what's right for you and the bubbah!

]]> By: Kat http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3106 Kat Sat, 06 Feb 2010 00:54:29 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3106 Good for all you mamas who made it through breastfeeding! I am a self-confessed breastfeeding wimp. After recovering from a C-section with my big boy (he was 9lbs 7oz at birth) breastfeeding started off OK but then became extremely painful with not much result. About two weeks after he was born, I caught a look at myself "hooked up" to my pump (not a pretty sight) and having worked for almost 45 min to get a full bottle of milk, I freaked out when I saw it turned pink. Apparently blood got into the milk and while it wouldn't have been seen by me had my son been at the boob, I didn't want to knowingly give him milk contaminated with blood. After too many tears and too much guilt, I did break down and give my son formula. Soon after I decided to stop breastfeeding/pumping entirely, and for me, it was the best decision then and even now. Looking at my son -- who is now 2-year-old and couldn't be healthier or happier -- you would never know he wasn't breastfed. I just want the mamas out there who can't or simply don't want to breastfeed for whatever reason to know it's not the end of the world and that your child can grow up just as healthy on formula as on breastmilk. Good for all you mamas who made it through breastfeeding! I am a self-confessed breastfeeding wimp. After recovering from a C-section with my big boy (he was 9lbs 7oz at birth) breastfeeding started off OK but then became extremely painful with not much result. About two weeks after he was born, I caught a look at myself "hooked up" to my pump (not a pretty sight) and having worked for almost 45 min to get a full bottle of milk, I freaked out when I saw it turned pink. Apparently blood got into the milk and while it wouldn't have been seen by me had my son been at the boob, I didn't want to knowingly give him milk contaminated with blood.
After too many tears and too much guilt, I did break down and give my son formula. Soon after I decided to stop breastfeeding/pumping entirely, and for me, it was the best decision then and even now. Looking at my son — who is now 2-year-old and couldn't be healthier or happier — you would never know he wasn't breastfed.
I just want the mamas out there who can't or simply don't want to breastfeed for whatever reason to know it's not the end of the world and that your child can grow up just as healthy on formula as on breastmilk.

]]> By: ashby http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3092 ashby Fri, 05 Feb 2010 19:55:58 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3092 My 4 week old growls too! And thrashes around and snaps his little jaws and literally CLAWS at my boobs! My 4 week old growls too! And thrashes around and snaps his little jaws and literally CLAWS at my boobs!

]]> By: ashby http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3091 ashby Fri, 05 Feb 2010 19:51:59 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3091 If it makes you feel any better, having too much milk can be pretty difficult as well - I am constantly face with a baby screeching in terror and frustration as my boobs shower him fire-hose style whenever my milk lets down. I've learned that "overactive letdown" actually causes some newborns (ie mine) to nurse even MORE often, because the gulping makes them too exhausted to eat for long. And the frequent nursing makes MORE milk....you get the picture :o) If it makes you feel any better, having too much milk can be pretty difficult as well – I am constantly face with a baby screeching in terror and frustration as my boobs shower him fire-hose style whenever my milk lets down. I've learned that "overactive letdown" actually causes some newborns (ie mine) to nurse even MORE often, because the gulping makes them too exhausted to eat for long. And the frequent nursing makes MORE milk….you get the picture :o )

]]> By: Christy http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3038 Christy Thu, 04 Feb 2010 04:13:53 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3038 After a not so ideal birth, we had an emergency c-section at 10 days past due, as well as her passing ALOT of meconium in the womb and having to be excessively suctioned, my little baby girl WOULD NOT latch for at least 3 days after. She would not open her mouth at all. I had to pump the colostrum and give it to her from a syringe. She finally did latch but she was also "tongue-tied". Our pediatrician didn't think it was much of a big deal so we did two weeks of excruciatingly painful, stressful and heartbreaking nursing before we went into the clinic to have a "frenulectomy" (a very fancy word for a very easy procedure of getting her frenulum clipped). It took a few more weeks of nipple shields and prescription nipple cream but like the original poster i am SO SO VERY GLAD we persevered and I am now going thru the sadness of her self-weening at 10 months. At least she is choosing to ween on her own, I guess? :) After a not so ideal birth, we had an emergency c-section at 10 days past due, as well as her passing ALOT of meconium in the womb and having to be excessively suctioned, my little baby girl WOULD NOT latch for at least 3 days after. She would not open her mouth at all. I had to pump the colostrum and give it to her from a syringe. She finally did latch but she was also "tongue-tied". Our pediatrician didn't think it was much of a big deal so we did two weeks of excruciatingly painful, stressful and heartbreaking nursing before we went into the clinic to have a "frenulectomy" (a very fancy word for a very easy procedure of getting her frenulum clipped). It took a few more weeks of nipple shields and prescription nipple cream but like the original poster i am SO SO VERY GLAD we persevered and I am now going thru the sadness of her self-weening at 10 months. At least she is choosing to ween on her own, I guess? :)

]]> By: Mary http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3024 Mary Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:30:17 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3024 ^^^ Exactly my point!! We ("we" being moms, doctors, nurses, lactation specialists, families, whomever) should be supportive EITHER way. I'm tired of hearing that using formula (or a combination of formula and breast milk) equals not caring for my baby or denying them from their nutrition. We shouldn't be so judgmental-every mom should be able to choose which is best for her and her baby, without any pressure. ^^^ Exactly my point!! We ("we" being moms, doctors, nurses, lactation specialists, families, whomever) should be supportive EITHER way. I'm tired of hearing that using formula (or a combination of formula and breast milk) equals not caring for my baby or denying them from their nutrition. We shouldn't be so judgmental-every mom should be able to choose which is best for her and her baby, without any pressure.

]]> By: @blondiekim http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3022 @blondiekim Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:25:24 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3022 ^^^ Exactly my point!! We ("we" being moms, doctors, nurses, lactation specialists, families, whomever) should be supportive EITHER way. I'm tired of hearing that using formula (or a combination of formula and breast milk) equals not caring for my baby or denying them from their nutrition. We shouldn't be so judgmental-every mom should be able to choose which is best for her and her baby, without any pressure. :) We need to support each other!! ^^^ Exactly my point!! We ("we" being moms, doctors, nurses, lactation specialists, families, whomever) should be supportive EITHER way. I'm tired of hearing that using formula (or a combination of formula and breast milk) equals not caring for my baby or denying them from their nutrition. We shouldn't be so judgmental-every mom should be able to choose which is best for her and her baby, without any pressure. :) We need to support each other!!

]]> By: Kim http://offbeatmama.com/2010/02/breastfeeding-was-crazy-hard-but-weaning-is-sad-too/comment-page-1#comment-3021 Kim Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:24:10 +0000 http://offbeatmama.com/?p=881#comment-3021 ^^^ Exactly my point!! We ("we" being moms, doctors, nurses, lactation specialists, families, whomever) should be supportive EITHER way. I'm tired of hearing that using formula (or a combination of formula and breast milk) equals not caring for my baby or denying them from their nutrition. We shouldn't be so judgmental-every mom should be able to choose which is best for her and her baby, without any pressure. ^^^ Exactly my point!! We ("we" being moms, doctors, nurses, lactation specialists, families, whomever) should be supportive EITHER way. I'm tired of hearing that using formula (or a combination of formula and breast milk) equals not caring for my baby or denying them from their nutrition. We shouldn't be so judgmental-every mom should be able to choose which is best for her and her baby, without any pressure.

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